These are two things that can kill your career and your happiness

These are two things that can kill your career and your happinessThese are two things that can kill your career and your happinessWe continually strategize on the things we need to do to advance our careers, close the sale, be happier, have better relationships and get what we want. More often than not it is what we need to cease doing that gives us the fruchtwein power.1. Dont discount your dreams.I used to live life from a but at least its not ______ perspective. I thought this was being positive because I could always think of something worse. This was an OK way of remaining optimistic in the face of adversity until it became habit for all of life and halted my ability to envision the openness of wonder.It wasnt until I was aware of this that I began to risk shifting to the vulnerable choice of exploring joy without expecting it to be short lived. To ushering in opportunity that I knew was meant for me without holding onto fear. To seeing all that was there with the curiosity of a child. This ability to stay in the moment without fast forwarding to an anticipated ending broke open the world for me. It put an end to all endings. It left me only with beginnings.I stopped needing to be right. I started listening to understand. I stopped being guarded. I started feeling acceptance. I stopped setting small goals. I started living in a big space of this is what freedom feels like.2. Dont wait for life to be fairWhen I was struggling as a single working mother of four children under seven-years-old on public assistance, homeless and without an automobile I used to think there would eventually be an epiphany where life would finally become fair and get better. But it didnt. And I grew more angry and defeated. Though I never stopped working harder and harder in corporate America toward my goal of being a good role model for my children.I rose quickly to the CEO level mostly, I think, because I had four beautiful mouths hanging open in front of me like baby birds and I had no fear of risks. In my marriage I had already experienced the biggest rejection of my life so hearing no didnt phase me. Ive never been qualified for any of the roles Ive applied for on paper but I could demonstrate measurable accomplishments that made this irrelevant. Still, I kept waiting for fair to happen. I kept my head down and everyday read and studied my fascination with human behavior.My biggest achievement came slowly and without fanfare. I never saw it coming. It wasnt my titles, my parenting or my home. It was the day I woke up and realized that life isnt fair its a world of connection. And the connection of most importance is the one we have with ourselves. When I accepted myself with all my flaws I drew others toward me instead of repelling them as I tried to be something I wasnt.Waiting for fair is like thinking the lion wont eat you because you didnt eat him. It isolates us and makes us prey to disappointment and perfectionism which kills careers. Fulfillment comes from swapping expectations and the need to be right for curiosity and wonder.You may be moving slowly toward something today. Know that youre moving in the right direction. Dont quit. Just keep going because youre almost there. Here is a free tool to help you navigate your career along the way 31 Success Practices for Leaders in the High Stakes Corporate World.MaryLeeGannon, ACC, CAEis an executive coach and corporate CEO who helps busy leaders get off the treadmill to nowhere to be more effective, earn more, bemore calm and enjoyconnected relationships with the people who matter while it still matters.Watch her FREE Master Class training on Three Things to Transform Your Life and Career Right Now atMaryLeeGannon.com.